Chapter 10
Diana descended from the skies. "This was an unexpected invitation," she said.
Batman didn't even turn around. He continued to monitor the area in front of him with binoculars. "Thanks for coming," he only replied.
"What are we doing here?" she asked.
"This rooftop is the closest high ground to Arkham Asylum," Batman explained.
"I see," Diana said. She saw the hospital less than a mile away. The fact that Batman had invited her to Gotham for this late-night assignment still surprised her. Both because of his response to her revelation concerning Audrey, and because of the last time she'd come to Gotham, that time uninvited. "What's going on?"
He turned his head to look at her. "The means with which Flash and Hawkgirl took care of Clayface the other night was effective, but messy," he said.
"Inserting large amounts of lit fireworks into a mass of mud will do that," she said dryly.
"Yes, but it scattered his body over a wide range. Nobody, not even I, is really sure how much clay there is in Matthew Hagen," he acknowledged grudgingly. "He appears to be able to replicate himself to some extent. But when the authorities collected the clay pieces that night for delivery to Arkham, I doubt they were able to get it all."
"Probably," she agreed, "but is that a problem? I mean, it's only a fraction of his body."
"Clayface has learned how to put himself in multiple places at once," he told her. "He's managed to split himself into as many as four separate pieces able to think individually. Which creates problems just like this." Batman paused. "For example, why has Brainiac never been permanently defeated?"
"Because he's just a computer program," Diana said, "and he has copies of himself everywhere."
"Exactly," Batman agreed. "Clayface will many times leave a portion of himself someplace safe before a fight, and if he's taken into custody, the smaller portion will find a way to free the rest of him. We're lucky he didn't do that before he fought J'onn, or the scene at the stadium could have turned out much differently."
"That's bizarre," Diana answered.
"That's Clayface."
"So you think it will happen tonight?"
"Arkham staffers will be doubly distracted tonight," he told her, looking toward Arkham again. "Quinn is being returned to their custody tonight, which means they'll also have to monitor the Joker for signs of unrest."
She nodded before starting. "Quinn? Harley Quinn? She's back."
"She's being extradited from Striker's as we speak," Batman said. "She should be here within the hour."
"But what about Poison Ivy?"
"I thought you knew," he said. "She escaped a few days ago."
"Escaped? Without Quinn?"
He nodded. "Funny. They were in the same cell, too, but either Ivy didn't want her to come, or Quinn didn't want to go. She's not talking, at any rate. She just dropped the fight against the extradition."
Diana stared at the asylum. "Really," she said.
Batman said nothing.
"So why me?" she asked.
"Pardon?"
"Why not Superman or GL or one of the others? Why did you ask for me?"
He didn't respond immediately. "For starters," he finally said, "I didn't feel like spending several hours alone with Flash."
She smiled but waited for more.
"Also," he continued, "we need to talk. About your princess."
"She's not mine," Diana replied, annoyed. "She's my girlfriend, not my possession."
"Hawkgirl seemed to think I was some kind of bigot the other day," he continued, unabashed.
"Are you?"
Batman shook his head. "I'm not. This isn't about me. I will admit that she doesn't seem worthy of you . . ."
"That's not your judgment to make," she retorted. "And you say that because you've based your opinion entirely on that one night in Kasnia."
"You're right, my opinion doesn't matter when it comes to who you're attracted to," Batman said. "Although even before Vandal Savage's coup d'etat, there was Kasnia's meddling in the Balkans - "
"Something several different countries were guilty of."
"And wholesale arms smuggling via the black market for years. They even sold guns to Ra's al-Ghul."
"That was her father and his ministries, not her."
"Even so, Kasnia has a bad reputation in the world community, and I don't want to see your good name besmirched if your connection to Audrey gets out," he said calmly.
"How about your not-so-private connections, speaking of al-Ghul?" Diana shot back. "Talia al-Ghul and Catwoman don't exactly have clean records, and yet I don't remember anyone bringing _that_ up when you entered the League."
Batman didn't reply at first. "I'm the Dark Knight," he said finally. "I play bad cop, not good cop. I'm the one with the reputation for only operating under cover of night. When I'm linked to someone like the Demon's daughter, people aren't exactly surprised. When your name is linked to the future ruler of an autocratic regime with criminal ties, people will react differently."
"That almost sounded like a compliment," Diana said.
"Like I said, you're a role model," Batman responded. "We've seen how quickly the public can turn on us. The League needs heroes with spotless reputations like you and Superman." He put the binoculars aside and turned toward her. "I see the worst of humanity every night I'm in Gotham, whether I'm Batman or . . . Bruce Wayne."
Diana looked at him. "Now you admit it," she said.
"There were people around that night," he told her. "Someone could have overheard. How did you know, by the way?"
"I've sparred with Batman, and danced with Bruce Wayne," Diana explained. "There were similarities. Plus the voice, and the fact that you were both in Paris at the same time, when you're usually both in Gotham . . . don't worry, I haven't told anyone."
"I'm not," he said. "Superman knows."
"With that X-ray vision, it would be hard not to, I guess."
"Anyway, I don't have a lot of faith in the public's capacity for handling your sexuality," he continued. "And even in those countries in Europe where it probably won't be a big deal, they're the people who are most likely to be upset about the Kasnian angle. It's like you've found something that will stir everyone's pot equally."
"And if Hakwgirl or J'onn announced they had fallen in love with a human, that would be an interspecies relationship, which some people might view as a form of bestiality," Diana said exasperatedly. "Look, Batman, if you're just warning me about the possible dangers, I appreciate it, even if I've already considered them. But if you're making this out to be some kind of threat - drop Audrey or we'll boot you out of the Justice League . . ."
"None of us want you to leave," Batman interrupted quietly. "We've all seen how less effective the League is when it's shorthanded. If your secret gets out and the public raises a stir, we'll stand behind you. But it needed to be said."
Diana waited, but he didn't appear to have anything more to say. "All right," she finally said.
"Diana."
"Yes?"
"There is no connection to Talia," he told her. "It was a fling. The fact that she chooses to see it as something more doesn't change that."
"Fine," Diana replied. "What about Catwoman?"
"There's the van they're using to transport Quinn," he said quickly, taking the binoculars again.
Diana smiled. They waited there for several hours, but there was no sign of Clayface anywhere, and they parted ways a few hours before dawn.
_________________________________
That didn't mean Diana had left Gotham. In fact she returned to Arkham Asylum a couple hours after the sun rose. "We had no idea you were coming, Wonder Woman," one of the doctors said as he hurried alongside her. "In fact, we rarely see any of your number, except of course - "
"I know," she said as she strode forward purposefully. "Has there been any incidents with Clayface since he was returned?"
"None that we know of," the doctor said. "We've been extremely careful, though. Until we saw the footage from the football game, we had no idea he could become that large."
"I'm told Harley Quinn was extradited last night," she mentioned. "Is she kept near the Joker?"
"Goodness, no," the doctor told her. "They have their ups and downs, but very little in between. They're a destructive pair. Whether they focus their destruction on innocent people or on each other depends on their mood at any given moment."
"I'd like to speak with her," Diana said.
"You're not here for Hagen?" the doctor asked, surprised.
"I'm looking for information unrelated to the Clayface incident," she said vaguely.
A minute later she found herself looking through the reinforced transparent barrier that kept Harley Quinn in her cell. Under the harsh lights, Quinn looked thirty-eight, not twenty-eight as she was. Of course, it might not be an effect of the lighting. Her medical record was littered with injuries caused by fights with Batman, other superheroes, and the police, but the Joker was responsible for multiple fractures and bruises. For Quinn, aging and death would come equally prematurely.
"Hello, Harley," Diana said.
Harley looked at her but didn't respond.
"Enjoy Metropolis? . . . How about Striker's Island?"
"S'okay," Harley muttered.
"Seen Poison Ivy lately?"
"Gee, here I thought you wanted to catch up," Harley answered sarcastically.
Diana didn't rise to her flippancy. Harley was a lightweight compared to most criminals she'd faced. "She left you behind," she reminded the lunatic. "Is that part of the plan? Rescue you after the transfer was made?"
"Maybe," Harley said.
"Maybe? Don't you know? I thought you were 'bestest friends'," Diana said, having studied the files for both women. "Doesn't she share things with you?"
"She shares plenty," Harley snapped.
"Why raise your voice, Harley?" Diana asked. "Maybe Ivy shared a little too much with you?"
Harley looked away. "I don't know what you're talking about."
Diana sat on the floor and crossed her legs so she could see Quinn's eyes better. "Ivy shared a few things with me. Not that she wanted to - I sparred for too many years on my home island not to be an expert reader of body language."
"I have nothing to say," Harley said, turning her back on Diana.
"My guess is she was afraid she was going to lose the extradition fight, so she decided to tell you how she felt about you," Diana continued, not caring if Harley faced the other way or not. Like she said, she could read the signals a person's body made like she could read a book, and even someone's back could be expressive. "And because of this sick, deluded, suicidal, romantic fancy you have for the Joker, you rejected her."
"We're in love," Harley retorted. She tried to sound tragic, but it came out like a whine. "I'm the only person who understands Mister J, sees him for the genius he is. That's why he needs me."
"He needs you because no one else will laugh at his twisted sense of humor," Diana said coldly. "He doesn't love you. He keeps you around. You're just a groupie who occasionally gets the right to fold his underwear and cook his meals."
"Stuff it," Harley spat at her.
"So anyway, you rejected Ivy, and she couldn't handle that. Which meant she couldn't handle sharing a cell with you any more," Diana said. "So she escaped. No one knows whether you chose to stay behind, or she refused to take you, but personally, I'd put my money on the latter. Ivy's not exactly a functional person either. She flies off the handle a lot, according to her files. I bet the next time you go looking for her, you'll find every door closed to you. You're dead to her."
"Stop it! Just leave me alone!" Harley screeched, but Diana could tell she was crying, and her shoulders were hunched high above her head. Her chin must have been resting against her chest practically.
She seemed to have a real knack for reducing these two to tears, Diana reflected. "I'm not convinced that any of you know what love is - you, Ivy, or the Joker. You're too selfish, too greedy. You and Ivy probably would have been just as much a disaster as the relationship you're in right now. But at least you might have had one thing you don't have now." Diana stood up. "Someone to love you back."
Harley's only response was to move from the back of the room to one of the corners, where she continued to face the wall.
Diana shrugged and walked away. When Poison Ivy was caught, it wouldn't be because of Harley. The girl - she was too immature to be considered a woman - didn't know anything. She felt an odd compulsion to pry into their relationship, but she didn't see anything she could do about it, and it wasn't her problem anyway.
When she heard that Quinn had escaped with the Joker a couple days later, Diana figured the book was closed on them.
______________________________
When Hawkgirl found out who had scheduled her for monitor duty with the Flash, they were going to get their very own special kind of lollipop - the kind that electrified.
She wasn't sure what he was talking about now. His van, she believed. John had told her about it. "It looks like it's style without substance, but it's got an extremely powerful engine under the glitz," he'd said.
"In other words," she'd replied, "it suits him perfectly."
Shayera hadn't spoken to John lately. It was something she was avoiding. She was waiting for the right time to tell him. She just wasn't sure if her heart and mind were in some sort of conspiracy to make her think that. Would there ever really be a "right time"?
She'd said very little to the Flash, and only now did it register with a superhero who talked enough for two people. "So what do you think, Hawkgirl?" he asked.
Having studiously not listened, she couldn't really say. But Superman had advised her once that the best course of action was to turn the conversation to something you were actually interested in. Flash would take care of the rest. "Some people don't get it," Superman had said. "They grit their teeth and try to ignore it, when they should make the best of it."
And there had been something she'd wanted to raise with the others . . .
"Here's a question for you," Hawkgirl said. "What's your take on Diana's new relationship?"
The Flash looked at her, and then he smiled. "Wasn't sure if that was a taboo subject with you."
"Why?"
"Everyone knows you and Di are close."
Closer than they'd been last week, Hawkgirl thought. "So what's your opinion? Honestly."
"Batman doesn't tell me who to date," Flash said. "Why should she be any different?"
"It doesn't bother you that she's with another woman?" she asked.
"Actually, there are two reasons why Diana being with another woman is better than her being with a man," he confided.
Hawkgirl began to wonder if this had been a good idea.
"One," Flash continued, "if she's a lesbian, then I never had a shot with her, and that's why she never responded to my essential suaveness."
She closed her eyes and shook her head.
"Two, and any man will tell you this, there's the whole girl-on-girl thing," he said.
"Does your _brain_ have any opinion on the matter?" Hawkgirl asked, annoyed. "By that I mean the one in your head, not the one below your belt."
Flash stopped. "Just that it doesn't bother me," he said. "I mean, the whole point of the last couple of weeks is that we're supposed to be able to trust each other. So I'm going to trust that Diana knows what she's doing."
"Works for me," Hawkgirl said after a moment.
"It should," Flash replied, grinning slyly. "It means I can focus all my flirtation on you now."
Hawkgirl almost choked. "And what," she asked, coughing, "would you do if I met someone?" Since it wasn't exactly a hypothetical.
"I've thought about that, actually," Flash answered, still smiling. "I would move that we add a new member to the League. Female, of course."
"Of course," Hawkgirl said sarcastically. "What better reason to expand the League?"
"Are you saying the five-to-two male-female ratio doesn't bother you?" he asked cunningly.
She didn't have a response to that.
"I happen to have considered a few possibilities," he continued. His fingers moved at a rapid pace over the keyboard in front of him.
Hawkgirl stood up and went behind his chair so she could see the screen better. "Supergirl?" she asked, raising her eyebrows.
"She's got Supes' powers," Flash said. "I'd say she's qualified. But those powers could be a liability too."
"You mean kryptonite?"
"No, I mean, how well can she suppress them? You ever listen to the Kinks?"
"I thought I was doing that right now."
"Ha-ha. 'I'm not the world's most physical guy, but when she squeezed me tight, she nearly broke my spine.' It's from a song they did. It got me thinking. What if Supergirl squeezes me in the throes of passion and breaks my back or something?"
Hawkgirl could only wonder the things he told John in that van of his.
"So I figured we should find a woman who gets by without super strength. I do have a couple candidates," he said modestly.
She stared at the first name. "Is this a joke?" she asked.
"What?"
"Black _Canary_?"
He looked at her. "Oh, right, the bird thing. Sorry, I hadn't thought of that. Still, just look at her. That profile! She's a blonde, just what the League needs. And she doesn't feel the need to hide that face with a mask."
Facing the computer, he couldn't see the way her eyes flashed behind her own mask. "You know, if you want to add an experienced member, someone good-looking with blonde hair who doesn't wear a mask . . ." she said speculatively.
"Yeah?"
She hit a few buttons as she leaned over his shoulder. "_And_ has experience with the League, as a bonus," she added.
The Flash stared at Aquaman's photo. "Funny, Hawkgirl," he muttered.
To be continued . . .
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